Most times in the world of business, blood isn’t thicker than water and family or friends will easily cross you thicker than strangers. But it’s quite unfortunate that many young or even established entrepreneurs are yet to realize this fact, and by the time they do; it’s already too late.

Imagine someone who works in a law firm where many times in a week, there firm gets phone calls from people around the country complaining bitterly of the money and opportunities they have lost by relating their business plans or doing business with friends, neighbors or family they’ve trusted.

In most of the complaints, in the beginning, was the assurance of smooth sailing, one of unusually high return with no risk in sight. Of course, everything is based on the promises of success emanating from a trusted and long-held relationship. But, by the time they call the office, the money is gone, their calls are not being answered, and in a worst-case scenario, some of their plans and business objectives are being carried out by the same people who have double-crossed them.

The Dream Killers

Most entrepreneurs have come to realize that being a family or friend is determined more by behavior than blood and closeness. Have you ever come across a Facebook or Twitter update in which people say they “landed a new job” or “won the jackpot” and they get tons of ‘likes,’ ‘shares’ and ‘comments?’ But when someone announces he or she is starting a new business, you feel like you’re in the graveyard because of the dead silence. Majority of entrepreneurs have experienced the same scenario to an extent: sharing a positive business idea and execution plan among family and friends only to be told succinctly and bluntly that it wouldn’t work.

Sure, it is emotionally painful, frustrating and sometimes heartbreaking to receive such unconstructive criticisms from people whom you believe are your friends and family. People whom you supposed should be supporting you all the way. Yeah, there you have it… your dream killers.

Although not all friends and family members are like that, it is apparent you have to keep them away from your business. Even Jesus said that a man’s enemies are the members of his own house. Let that marinate for a second.

It will interest you to know that most people who start businesses and chase their dreams of realizing their business objectives get much of the support they received from complete strangers. The harsh reality is that friends and family are the people who are least likely going to support your business.

The Family/Friend Stranger Support Test

Now, let’s take a ride with a hypothetical scenario. Supposing you told your family and friends that you are quitting your job and planning to move on to Fiji to start up a coconut farm and some yoga retreat. Unless you are lucky to have an unusually understanding and supportive family, they would probably think you have gone “coco-nuts,” and tell you how silly and ridiculous you sound about moving to Fiji. They might even admonish you, telling you to stop being unreasonable, giving you all sorts of reasons why it could never happen. And before you know it, your big dream has been shot down even before you get started.

Now, take the same conversation and interact with a couple of complete strangers at the barber’s shop or community center, for instance, and narrate your Fiji dream to them. What you would most likely get is a tinkling of their imaginations. Many of them would start brainstorming different ways of how you can make it happen. One of them might even suggest a relative or a friend who lives in Fiji or has been there for a couple of years and still have some reliable contacts that can help in getting you an excellent location for your business.

Another might just be working for a health food company that needs a regular supply of organic coconut oil and could suggest getting you linked up with their corporate buyer, and more. And straight out of the blue, your big dream is suddenly becoming a reality.

Now, compare that to what your friends and family said earlier, and you know why you have to keep them in the dark when it comes to establishing or running your business.

That said, this leads us to another subject;

Why Are Strangers More Helpful Than Family And Friends?

Why would someone who doesn’t know a damn thing about you be the one most likely to help you in realizing your business dreams? And why on Earth should your family and friends—the people whom you’ve known for X amount of years and trust and look up to be the ones most likely to be supportive, be so quick to shut down your dreams like you’re crazy?

Below are some answers to these questions.

They Have A Contrary Belief

In reality, it is mostly down to the fact that your friends and family have a different perception and understanding of things compare to yours. Though their points and arguments may have some validity to them, just remember that their views stem from their own belief system, which is in sharp contrast to yours. Would you instead dance to their tune of perception to satisfy them or implement yours to realize your goals?

Fear Of Failed Or Incomplete Dreams

Another thing that makes your family and friends sound utterly contrary to your business dreams is down to the fact that they are probably reeling from the effect of a failed or unaccomplished dream of their own. Most of the dream-bashing stems from your friends and family fear (or in some cases, envy) for you that you are towing that same line of ‘failure’ and doesn’t want you to go that way and feel the same pain like they did.

But most have forgotten so soon that we are all born differently—with different destiny and unique gift in every one of us. When we choose to deny implementing that gift, rather sacrificing its use to please the weakness of others, then we are bound to suffer for it and deny ourselves a glorious opportunity to tap into our true potentials.

How Family And Friends Can Ruin Your Business Dream

If you’re a young entrepreneur just trying to start up a business, it would be unwise to seek the opinion of your family or closest friends, especially when you’re quite aware that bashing is what you would most likely get from them. If you make your plans known to them, it might kill your zeal and you will never be able to implement your plans and realize your dreams.

On the other hand, if you already have a business going and you need a hand to help you, never hire your friends or family members. Doing so could ruin your business because:

• Emotions would always take a central role, which might hamper strict business practices and implementation of objectives
• You have very little to no bargaining chips with your family or friends at the hem of affairs
• Most friends and family lack the necessary expertise to run your business, and hiring them would only speed up the demise of your business
• It is always challenging to create defined and predetermined roles or structural hierarchies, and more

Now, do you see why you shouldn’t confide in your friends and family about your business plans or hire them to run it for you? Come to think of it; friends and family are not even your ideal customers. They don’t represent your future customers who would roll out their wallet and throw cash at you. A lot of times they are more loyal to established businesses than yours. So why not get on with your dreams without them?

How To Prevent Your Family And Friends From Being The Worst Enemy Of Your Business

Now, you have seen what family and friends can do to your business. They might mean well for you, but they don’t see beyond their own beliefs. They do not understand what the future holds nor see things the way you see them.

So you may be wondering; what can I do about it? It is simple; don’t talk about it with them, especially if you are sure such discussions would only lead to family stress and tension for you. Save your dream-building discussions for strangers, including seeking professional advice from a specialist or counselor in that field. Definitely seek a mentor. Creating a network group would also provide you with some tips regarding your business objectives. To sum this all up, it is best to work with like-minded individuals who will help you and support you on your journey to building your empire.